If a girl drunk dials you she's at least entertained the idea of sleeping w/ you correct?
YES
But never have I ever had sex with a dirty talker before, so it was something else, to say the least. I signed up to get laid, not play Penthouse Mad Libs.
you would pick up someone in the library
I think i found my new favorite workout. Go to a party where you dont know anybody and constantly walk around the house so you dont look awkward standing alone. im up to 1.8 miles
Is it wrong of me that I wish I could be a midget for a day so I can give head standing up?
I now have an ENTIRE drawer of unused disposable silverware from Boston Market... and you guys said I needed to "buy" kitchen stuff
i'm calling it girls night to make myself feel better but lets be real.....i wasn't going to get any guys tonight regardless
im currently assessing the tequila situation in preparation of your arrival
The only way I can describe this shit is male aloe vera plant in both looks and feel its standing in the toilet
Thanks for that....my girlfriend picked up my phone and saw that
Hypothetically how does one go about throwing away a dildo?
I hate being the only medical professional in the group. I always end up patching you guys or being the DD when I'm on call. I have problems I need to drown in booze too...
I just got my evaluation. My manager told me he hated my guts and pretty much wanted to stab me in the face. Then he gave me an "exceeds expectations" on pretty much everything and a raise.
At least your nickname is not Plunge Slut and that nickname is not in a published thesis work
I just found three upside down bottles of grapejuice in a triangle around the air freshener above my toilet... I guess it was one of those nights
You know my vagina and my heart have a mind of their own even when it’s pouring snow.
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