If I had a sex resume I'd get tons of jobs.
So I've been drinking and I told the bf about the gf he almost fell of his chair
My penis is the apex of life and all other references. Lookin for a cheap vagina at this point. And cheap Korean BBQ
Fact: Godrick looks like David Archuleta
My social work teacher just told our class about her bicurios adventures in college
is she hot?
She is now
Just drove past a church with a sign near it that said, "God wants to be your daddy."
Next thing I know we're all standing in the kitchen holding hands and thanking God for the beer.
A 300 lb dude in a sundress yelling bible verses while wearing a raggedy anne wig is just as funny as I thought it would be. Thank you san francisco.
you started putting condoms on anything with a point, then you were yelling at the lamp for using your last condom...
i don't care if its just a preseason game, my pick up a guy and suck him off in the bathroom skills are in midseason form
That last minute feeling of hesitation on whether I should bring my health card to the bar usually means I'm in for a good night.
Being at this stripclub only reinforces how single I am. And I was *just* becoming okay with that.
do u know what happened to the bottles last night?
apparently we hid them.... i google mapped the location into my phone
It bothers me when I see my old fuck buddies starting families on Facebook.
u better not lose ur virginity to a sugar daddy who doesn’t post a pic of himself to tinder
Randomize