I just gave my patient permission to swallow while pregnant. She was so embarrassed to ask...but her bf was really happy with the answer.
I started dry heaving in the middle of sex and she says "You moan funny."
And as far as being fat goes I just did like 20 minutes of p90x and now i'm eating frosting out of the container....
ill do whatever it takes for me to get more high and eat pie
the fire alarm went off. we werent sure whether to leave or turn the music up louder
hey you forgot your wet suit in my room you can come grab it whenever
I'll be spending 4/20 on a cruise ship, so i need a babysitter to make sure I don't reenact Titanic
Got hereat 8. Had 6 beers 2 shots and a game of diZZY BATOS
Found her with a stray dog now called champagne, crying about how she feels a mom now. Had to take her home. The dog too.
Yes I slept with him, he was the only one not wearing a costume. Guys with costumes are just trying to impress you.
I agreed not to hook up with any randoms while she's on vacation, if that isn't a show of good faith then I don't know what is...
"willing to pay anyone fun whos willing to hang out and laugh at my jokes while my friends are MIA" is this to desperate?
I woke up on a navy base in a different time zone. I'm never leaving tallahassee again.
And one groomsman rode a suitcase cart like a skateboard until he crashed and took out a piece of sheet rock. Later he pulled out his nuts.
So pro tip. do not order drugs from india and then assume you know your tolerance level.
Randomize
