Ross. Joey. Chandler. Who would you do?
I am officially superior to you. I said "Go Go Gadget Dick" before I fucked her. I dare you to beat that.
i don't know what the guinness world record is for longest time eating nothing but skittles but i'm going on six days
looking at that huge scar on my leg from when i got drunk at 9 AM and walked into a grill. so excited for football season to start again!
He ate me out on the balcony. My asian neighbors cats are judging me...ALL 3 OF THEM!!
He kept pouting and saying i cockblocked him and I kept yelling "I'm sorry...but the cock was never out to be blocked"
Note for the future: whiskey syrup is AMAZING on 3am pancakes.
I'm sorry for gagging during our first time having sex
I was drunk
Please answer
I just want to know how she convinced 6 sober ROTC guys to have an ab contest on a street corner at 2 in the morning.
i am an animal i am literally locking myself in my house and not coming out for a week i don't deserve to be in public
In case you're wondering what eggs stolen from an elementary school's chicken coop taste like, delicious. Delicious is what they taste like.
He said he was a banker. Then he told me he made 15 an hour. I said he was a shitty banker then fucked his friend.
I woke up at 6 and was laying at the top of my stairs.
My mom is coming to visit today & it's giving me anxiety. I feel like she can see through me & into the whore I've become.
It's three am. I'm drunk in a stairwell in Vegas. My flight leaves at six. Help.
Randomize
