yeah she is the one who tells people i beat girls.. which ironically make me want to punch her in the face
I think im pregnant
I think you have the wrong number
I just googled how to quit your job and cause a big uproar at the same time....i tell you how tomorrow goes, i'm so excited....
This is a mass text. Does anyone know what the hell the asian woman at the end of Napoleon Dynamite is doing in the movie
I'm so high that a hulu ad convinced me to go on healthybaby.com
i am devastated. she was DTF and I was about to puke, i told her to wait outside my room for a second. Puked. Passed out woke up, she was gone. Found puke stains on my keyboard that seem to spell out youporn....
That drug basically just makes anything that's in your mouth awesome
I swear, if he gets me a bowling ball for Christmas, I will throw it at him.
Russell brand is gross. Everytime I see him I just wanna give him a bath. He's like a used condom.
Yea. It was an issue. Great time though. Apparently I went through the coat check, put my coat on and forgot I had it so I tried to go through again and just didn't understand why thy weren't helping me. Dave coat checked his pants.
And one night I got way too drunk and thought he said call me a polish name so I called him Konrad. Now he thinks I cheated on him with a Konrad.
That's my new pick up line call me a polish name
I woke up naked with my work shoes on
Knew i was going to puke. So i grabed a bowl out of the kitcken in the dark before bed...Ended up puking into a spaghetti strainer...
....I just did my boss
I love you. And I will hold your hand as we skip on the road to hell.
But you''re still having sex with him. And a hobo convinced you to.
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