I sk at the spereo and my dad gave me and all access pass
what???
AN ALL ACCESS PASSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS
I am puke
last week i woke up at this guys house...this week i woke up at his ex girlfriends
about to try to wax my asshole... wish me luck
you were smoking 3 cigarettes at once saying 'cancer isn't real! Its all in your head!'
it's a little hard to watch the basketball games with my family considering they keep cheering for the guy that i had a one night stand with...
When they saw it was the 7th inning of the baseball game one took off running for the beer stand while his friend is yelling "BUY THE KEG"!
He was eating mac and cheese. Raw. Like as in he was eating the uncooked noodles then pouring the dry cheese in his mouth.
U owe me five dollars for that paper towel you bet i wouldnt eat last night
We're discussing which museums we should go to when we shroom. How ill would Picasso be?
Sometimes I envy you, when I'm not praying for your soul.
My morning started with my mom giving me the number for a substance abuse councellor. How's your day going?
it'll be like a game of Russian Roulette, but with my vagina.
It was great. We stayed up all night talking about objects he'd put in his theoretical vagina.
I just tried to lit a bowl with my chapstick.
Randomize