And then I chipped his tooth because I got too into it. Helloo, single life.
We had sex on my friends waterbed ..after that the whole school kept asking him if he had fun getting "sea-sick" last night.
im going to live freely with my legs opened and my heart closed
His little brother just walked in, asked me if I'd blown his brother yet and then announced that he and his friends were going to play outside so we could play too.
I just found pizaa roll in my hair. Already been to class today
I wanted to be mature but the vodka was resilient.
It was like coming out my mothers vagina again in slow motion
I don't know if apple cider everclear was such a good idea
We compared her boobs to bacon. I'm probably going to have to justify that.
Next time I take edibles I'm getting chipotle to cater the event
Are you trying to say I've made an emotionally well rounded transformation similar to the Grinch?
Tell me again why we had to Facebook stalk your therapist?
So I crawled off the trampoline to puke in the neighbors yard. Wonderful house guest right here
Dude you were so wasted you thought a fake electric candle was real and tried to light your cig with it. Multiple times.
fyi my negative pregnancy test is taped to the fridge...i'll take it over an A+ any day. be proud.
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