More tranny stories later!
i don't remember it, but i know we had sex because my stuffed animals were facing the wall
OH GOD PAJAMAS ARE SUCH A HARD CONCEPT RIGHT NOW
Can we please stop calling your vagina the cave of wonders?
One of two things would happen: He'd love it, or you'd get a restraining order.
im trying to find a facebook picture of him that doesnt make me regret sleeping with him. its not working
if I could send you my dick right now I would. that's how good of a friend I am.
Bunch of Navy warships just sailed into New York Harbor for Fleet Week. Nobodys getting laid this weekend.
The best part of tonight is drunk commenting on my moms pic about how birds just want to give you diseases and pluck out your eyes
I borrowed a glass of wine. And the bottle. Your cat said it was ok
Sorry I didn't answer your call last night, I was peeing on the driveway.
Did you know that taking off a bra with teeth burns ninty calories?
Hey can you explain why there's a dissected coconut in my purse????
If you break up with me one more time it's over.
He pulled out a Plan B pill and handed it to me as I left like it was a party favor. God Bless America.
Randomize
