I just went through her cupboards. Eye patch and sword. nowhere near each other. different shelfs.
I just spent an hour correcting all the grammar and spelling of all the 2pac songs on my ipod
maybe it wasnt such a good idea to pregame our lease signing...
You had already cockblocked me. The cops were just an assist.
It was mandatory to shotgun a beer before we were allowed to eat dinner
i just sent him like 8 different sexts and he texted me back about how good the hummus is that i left in his fridge.
I came so hard just now that I think I may have regenerated.
One of those nights had to have been when we tried to walk through the McDonald's drive through -- and then got in the car with complete strangers. And stole their hamburgers.
Dude if i sent you a picture of the inside of my fridge would you be able to break down and explain everything that was in it?
i convinced him to be a french maid for halloween. he has no idea what he's in for. i just ordered the breast forms.
You were supposed to be my wingman and all you kept to her friend was "kill it with fire"..
I'm all dressed in my outfit from last night, and I'm not even the sluttiest person in Walmart right now. God bless Miami.
You ever just SEE a guy and know he's good at choking someone out?
It's 3 am.
He's on the porch naked. Help.
I have cats now. Five of them.
Have you considered starting a global domination firm?
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