Dude I'm telling you, conditioner is the best for jerking it in the shower. It feels great and afterwards everything is all smooth
he told me my vagina needed a tic tac
Theres someone in the car behind me eating corn on the cob & talking on the phone
How are you going to be there by 9am?
Relax I always go to these conferences hung over
You say that like it's a positive quality
sticking your hands in the toilet to wash your face is not acceptable. ever. i don't care how drunk you are.
I know you claim to have a large penis but I do not believe in what i cannot see. Sort of like god.
I seriously think my heart may fail. And I didn't even grab a toilet beer :(
Tony's mom to him at breakfast: "I found the shirt you wore last night in the bushes this morning."
He told me that he'd ride his snowmobile from Cincinnati to Toledo in this blizzard just so I could give him head.
I have no concept of chastity or moderation, she is a Catholic guilt poster child, how could I not try to hit that
What's the best way to tell someone that I accidentally wound up in a gay harem?
It's okay to masturbate while watching the Comey testimony right?
Dad literally changed the channel from an episode of Big Bang Theory to another episode of Big Bang Theory. That's why I hate this show.
I don't mean to alarm you but are the strongest testicles in the family. I just learned I can lift 90 lb with my balls! Beat that.
Dick is dick. I’m not turning it down because he’s younger than me. Covid has been a real cockblock and I’m a woman with needs
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