I'm saving my limes so I'll know how many drinks I've had.
I do the same thing, but I use ice cubes.
I'm going to show my kids 2 girls 1 cup just to scare them away from porn
He came in, laid on our floor and started to make a snow angel.. On the floor. Then he just left never said a word. 20 mins later walked back in and dropped his pants, looked down and said "wow im happy i had boxers on."
We stole a cat. That is all you need to know.
Nicee. Atleast your phone doesn't change pen in to PENISsSSSSSSS like mine does
P.S. I just watched The Muppets. I feel like I just got a sadness enema.
You went into the shower with my roommate and cursed him out asking why he was there
DC is easy, you will figure it out.
I'm drunk and blonde. You are wayyyy underestimating this.
she pointed to my dick and said you are going to save the world
I just spent 5 minutes saying how beautiful you are and you come back with dont get fat cause you have weird nipples.
I'm proud of you for choosing to be an organ donor on your fake!!
Dry heaving on campus is my new low. Also, go pats
i'm licking honey sensually off my arm while alone in my room. what has my life come to
What's your opinion on eating ass? Just looking for a yes or no
I'd like to know who hasn't seen my tits tonight.
Randomize
