Bike broken, reschedule party till thursday:(
Eating Doritos is not nearly as enjoyable when I'm not drunkenly feeding them to peacocks.
There are 3 pics of me on my camera, naked, wearing only an apron, scooping ice cream.
He's really hot. I think he's gonna be my reason to shave this winter.
Come on. It's already happy hour in Europe...Man up. "I'm at work" and "it's a tuesday" are not valid excuses.
I'm hoping he'll tell everyone how great in bed I am. Well, how great in bathroom floor I am.
I just had someone I don't even know on Facebook message me saying it seems like I drink too much and should slow down.
She is singing the swedish chef song and throwing utensils. I love this place
she made sit in a corner, drink nothing but water and told me she was worried about me because i picked up an irish guy at a taxi rank. says the girl who invented tequila night and fucked a guy in a park across the street from a sweet sixteenth.
It isn't possible and the very mindfuck of that concept gives me a lady boner.
But the guy you're fucking should not be within ten pounds of your weight when you're five fucking feet tall and he's 6'2". That's all I'm saying.
Seriously I'm dying. All my insides are fighting their way out of me. With light sabers and machetes.
We hooked up last night. I think it was great for our friendship.
I can't believe I watched you put a tampon in in the parking garage
you tried to fight the cop who was busting the party, you said you had a constitutional right to do a keg stand...
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