And now I'm afraid that I'm a pornographic eater.
I'm 3 blocks south of you watching drag queens.
Just saw a homeless guy with a sign that said "Family abducted by aliens. Need money for ransom" and on the back of the sign it said "And it's only $.88"
I think it is impossible 2 take a person seriously when their last name is Pancake
Hahaha alright after 5 shots I'm not allowed to touch glass or boys with girlfriends.
These shoes are way too nice for a walk of shame. Its how I keep myself in line.
its weird that my cat bites every fat chick i bring home. i repeat every fat chick, qhT KINDA FRIEND ARE YOU
Just had sex in the darkroom, while a class was going on ten feet away. I finally have a good sex story.
you smell like cheap hookers & chicken nuggets.
This is the beginning of the end. Testicle Tuesdays and free ball Friday are going to scar people for life
Dude that picute of your balls will haunt my nightmares
Do you ever get high and look at your cat and feel like you know them on an intellectual level?
I'm drunk. And I'm alone. Eating chicken fingers in my underwear. I'd say life is grand.
I hope a pyrotechnic goes off in your asshole and seals it shut for life.
Me too.
are you drinking tonight?
I have an exam tomorrow
so yes.
Have you had an orgasm with an n95 mask on yet? It was better than being choked.
Randomize
