So tell me more about the cum that came out of your nose
I'm getting very mixed reviews. One friend told me to stop drinking bc the last 3 times he's heard from me I've either peed my pants, been throwing up, or people have been having sex beside me.
Strangely enough I'm encouraging you to keep drinking for all the same reasons.
it's official, after last weekend my girl number is higher than my guy number. fix this.
The sun is so bright. Whhyyyyy. EYES ARE DEAD.
he had the kids march single file in front of us on the way home so they didn't have to watch him pulling me passed out in their wagon...
i would have thought, that you two being my best friends, one of you would have atleast tried to catch me before i hit the ground after blacking out.
she looks like one of those semi-pretty girls that turns into a 9 while she's riding your cock like she's trying to catch a train on horseback.
He acted like he was sleep fucking because I woke up to him screwing me in the middle of the night and he had is eyes closed and was mumbling things the whole time and wouldn't respond to me.
Is that even possible?
I called him by the wrong name to test him and he instantly stopped, rolled over and acted like he was still sleeping...I think he might break up with me tomorrow.
So... Apparently, "Home" isn't the correct response when a cop asks for your address...
He was like, I wanna take it slow. I took off my bra And I was like, either we have sex now or you get out.
I feel a little uneasy about having my grandma sleep in my bed that I've banged chicks in not too long ago... Fuckin blizzards
All I know is that I have a black eye and an extra $200 in my wallet. Other than that, clueless.
Vacuum the place before you go out of town there are random glitter cocks everywhere
...its technically supposed to be for the bridal shower but I think I can find an ensemble that says "im hopped up on x. Stick your tongue down my throat." As well as " im supporting your marriage to my brother"
It’s amazing such a big dick belongs to such a boring guy
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