dear santa what can i do with your candy cane?
Turning 21 on Saint Patty's day. I like to think this is what my alcoholic ancestors have prepared me for
This guy just showed us his webbed feet to prove that his son was actually his son
I just realized i came back home with my lei that one night. How do i forget my bra but remember my lei?
Police were closing down the bar due to gunfight and I was crying because they wouldn't let me finish putting temporary shamrock tats on my boobs
You can't possibly imagine how much I miss you. At least I'll always have that hidden folder in my computer.
When I see myself in tank tops and push up bras I seriously wonder why I'm not President.
NO I WOULD NOT GET A GUMMER FROM A GRANDMOTHER
I don't even remember what he looks like. All I know is he's 6 foot 100. I like that.
Yeah, I mean I'll probably fuck him regardless but I'm trying to be a lady about it.
just move with us, we wanted to get a dog. youre kind of the same thing..
Also I feel like death. But like. In a good way
How do I explain to work that I woke up in my underwear on a trampoline and that I'm not coming in?
While walking to class I was handed a red bull, condoms, and a mini bible. I love my school.
My boss is explaining why he thinks time goes by faster and faster. Bc of the rockets. No lie.
Randomize
