I'm too stoned for this. I'm Canadian.
I didn't join FB to see my only child straddle that boy in all her pictures.
it's kind of nice to have a picture of me making out with someone and actually know who it is for once
There's nothing like puking in the airport on the way TO Vegas. Something tells me i pregamed a little too hard.
I lost count after the 4th body shot but I think I'm wearing at least 3 different peoples clothes.
What color are my eyes?
Ummmm... 34 C?
nothing says roomie bonding better than a sunday shroom trip.
Please come back. She just stuck her bloody band-aid to Zach's face, has a fire extinguisher, and is talking about tornados hiding.
Just got back from the tanning beds. I'm a lobster. I fear for the safety of my nipples falling off.
I just smoked a bowl with the lady who runs the special olympics. Your move.
I just saw two homeless guys bond over the fact that they both use Crown Royal bags as wallets in Burger King.
I never thought that at some point in my life I would end up in the back of a cop car dressed as Pumba #HakunaMatata
I HAVE 5 FELTING NEEDLES AND THEYRE GOING DIRECTLY INTO YOUR EYES IF YOU POST THAT SHIT
I'm a shining star this evening. Dancing with a cane in rite aid now. I should be kept under survaillance.
But he said I was unpatriotic for not having sex with him. What was I suppose to say to that?
Randomize
