so chris just stuck his hand between rachel's legs and yelled 'TROUT!' and we were like...you're wasted
Do you ever go through someone elses pictures and just appreciate the fact that youre not really friends with them?
well he showed me a naked baby picture and i was right it hasn't grown
she requested me as her brother on facebook.... biggest. letdown. ever.
Just saw a bouncer shoot a stripper with a squirt gun. He looked at me n said,"gotta keep em in check." I'm in love with this place
Something about a hand job in a car doesn't scream girlfriend
So recap time do u remember biting that girls hand?
In other words, he somehow found his way to my apartment, wasted, and was naked on my new couch. Completely naked. It was too special to pass up.
Then she cat effected the picture of my dick I sent her the other night. I'm in love.
Literally just one second of unclenched butt hole away from shitting my pants.
We were having margaritas and I was saying "back when I was drinking..." They looked all confused. Then I realized "holy shit they think THIS is drinking?"
We knew it was an interesting night when we found my thong wrapped around a chocolate chip muffin in the fridge.
I mean, you've had my nipples in your mouth now, so I think we've reached a certain level of friendship.
he was peeing off the deck shouting "urinals are for pussies" that's how much hurricane.
Every time I look at him 'Relax' by Frankie Goes to Hollywood plays in my head. Is that weird?
Randomize