so how does one go about finding a summer fling?
take advantage of an intern
She even gives head with a lisp.
I'd just like to inform all involved that walking into a liquor store holding a milk crate at the beginning of a night as stock ends badly
Just saw a midget on a motorcycle. Best sight for a hangover ever.
July fourth my place, drunken bubble slip n slide. Yes this is happening and yes I am 31
Yeah... I still gave her a hug because I felt really bad though. I mentioned that my boyfriends grandma just died too, just to reinforce that I'm straight afterwards.
He said i got a new job lets blow this money he bought 4 bottles at the club he is now crying after seeing the reciept
I didn't want to walk to anymore parties because I found a cat. It was magical.
And then he serenaded me with "Pimps don't cry" from 'The Other Guys'. If that's not love I'm not sure what is
You know what id love more than anything right now? ..a back rub while eating biscuits and gravy
He carried you out but the best part is you kept saying "can't I keep dancing" as you were gushing blood
He's literally cuddling with the washer and dryer.
It may be a corded vibrator from the 90s but it gets the job DONE
she passed out standing next to the car. her head hit the door so hard the alarm went off. she instantly snapped out of it and started sprinting away
Whats a little breast milk between friends?
Randomize
