They say you shouldnt they say its no good for the environment in your vagina
she said she'd blow me if I bought one of her sorority raffle tickets. Goddamn it's gettin easy
were trying to schedule when i can give him head in between classes.
Funny favor to ask you... can you ask James to ask Chris if he came in me ? Trying to assess whether or not I need plan B.
Honestly, I don't care if the only reason she gave me her beer was because she was bisexual and wanted to touch my vagina. Beer is beer.
I went out as a member of the house of Gryfindor and came home as Snooki
It's that moment where you find out the girl you've been dating for 6 months is a mob daughter. Post breakup.
Watching elf, eating a tub of ice cream, and coming to terms with the fact that I haven't had sex in 5 months. Happy fucking holidays.
I didn't even realize I grinded on a security guard last night. Shit. Did he at least like it?
idk the fact that her roommate had a sign that said "enter without knock, exit without cock" makes me really NOT want to go steal her pot.
Blacking out is all I've done this year and we're only 3 days in. Checkmate bitch.
and then I drunkenly screamed, "you can ride that Uber all the way to revenge city!"
which was funny until I realized I paid for my enemy's cab to go fuck my ex
There are no winners in a lube eating competition.
This is not a test of the emergency warning system. He has broken my vagina. I repeat he has broken my vagina. Damn it was good.
I just googled "how to blow an uncircumcised guy" and did serious research. That's how badly I want to fuck him.
You misuse your internet privileges.
Randomize
