Whatever it was. it was pregnant.
Don't worry, there is no such thing as a fat, old or ugly blow job.
Its official, drinking for 15 hours counts as a suicide attempt
omg i hate the new neighbors. why cant a bitch just be hungover in peace on a wednesday morning.
I'm sick of being the only unemployed member of the group. Doing things alone isn't partying. Its sad.
There's a bachlorette party going on at the bowling alley, so we'll see who wins greatest shitshow tonight.
Topless dodge ball cldnt top that
I DON'T WANT TO KNOW THE SCIENTIFIC REASONING BEHIND WHY I STARTED A HAREM ESPECIALLY NOT FROM A GUY IN THE HAREM!
PUT YOUR FRESHLY SHAVED MEXICAN POON ON THAT BEARD. NOW.
The feeling are messing with the penis
Besides, I'm booked tomorrow. I'm planning on drinking heavily and crying in the bath.
How do I word.. " hey, I need you to fuck me really hard and see if you or I can feel my birth control. No worries, this is just an experiment." In a nice way without them feeling used.
Sorry you uh had to see that last night. That's the problem with open fields, no privacy...
Went to bed still wearing my bralette. When I was changing this morning, a Tootsie Roll fell out. I'm definitely living my best life.
I’m going to hump him until his teeth hurt and then I’m going to have my way with him
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