I am SOOO high
tell me about your high
HUGE THUMBTACKS
I think my plan to not drink this week was just ruined by my mothers discovery of the chat function on facebook
i asked if you wanted help changing your sheets after you threw up in bed. you politely declined. i take no responsibility after that.
It feels wrong to have dick mouth at a family dinner.
No no, there's drunk and then there's 'spooning with lawn gnomes' drunk.
Water skiing blazed is the most scary thing I've ever done.
yeah...that's gonna come up in court
I am sleeping in the bathtub because my bed is too soft.
So yeah he had good weed?
Celebrating landing my dream job by watching zombie movies and drinking free booze in the bath. I'm like 90% sure I just won life.
i fell out of the car and didnt spill my drink. come overrrr
truly a win in your book
I'm playing a lilo and stitch drinking game
Aloha alcoholism.
Drinking wine from a straw at 6:15 in the morning. This is what college does to people.
I just want to smoke weed and be the little spoon all winter. My modern day hibernation.
I just woke up and I don't really remember anything past 1pm. How much am I missing?
A good 10-11 hours. You got laid twice. Also, you out-ran a cop and played football with a lamp.
Juice tastes so weird without alcohol
Randomize
