and my herpes radar will keep us safe
home. puking in laundry basket.
Note: footlong is not the password to the subway wi fi network.. p.s- im super high
And i laid in the yard with carrots on my chest cause i wanted a bunny
it's like doing a sit-up... but, you're inside someone
and then he tried plucking my nose hairs. lines were crossed.
I want to apologize but I don't know how. Do I just say "sorry for OD'ing on your couch"? I think that just sounds weird.
This means I've slept with 2 ppl that live in vans...my life is complete
Inebriation Olympics: Team Drunk vs Team Stoned. This weekend. It's on.
Called Apple, my penis pics are safe.
After we banged he volunteered to ducksit while I went to work. I think that's true love.
At least I got steroids and a baguette out of the deal
Well, personally I like to keep my blackmail in well organised folders.
Step one: We finally agreed on an au pair that we both wanna fuck.
I just found out through a drunken phone call that my parents thought I'd grow up to be a porn star. It's kind of scary how accurate they were at how skilled I'd be at sex.
Randomize
