trying to fathom saturday night and the fact that Rainn Wilson now hates me. my brain hurts.
I'm at the bar and I just saw some unnecessary and accidental cooter...sometimes I think girls need a license to go out pantyless in public.
Do you think my bosses would frown upon Jameson with breakfast on this holiest of days?
All I've accomplished this quarter is making Uno an acceptable drinking game.
he obviously didn't care that i was sleeping and dreaming about ellen degeneres knitting me a christmas sweater.
Omg just remembered. I tried to kidnap a dog.
some asshole was waslkibg around with ab electric razor and shaving parts of peoples heads.
what kind of roommate is she really? she wouldn't even hold my hair back.
The rest of us are chipping in to soundproof your bedroom. This is getting ridiculous.
I honestly don't think it will ever get topped. Unless a real female cop arrests me, then fucks me. That's it.
Who doesnt want to be Yoda? I mean seriously, how sweet would that be? Live to 400, not give a shit about love and all that, know fucking mind tricks and smoke awesome swamp weed. I'm down.
She said "we just have chemistry" ... I wanted to say "no, you just have a vagina."
You proposed a left ass cheek firmness contest and got a surprising number of contestants. Then you ruined it by groping someone who wasn't playing and awarding them first place.
Going to the pool bar doesn’t exactly count as “exploring”
So I realize somewhere between mildly irritated and outright belligerently pissed is where you are, but as to location, where are you?
Randomize
