Haha na a cat just ran under your car. Howd that happen?
Probably a woman cat. Doesnt think things through
I woke up and my clothes were soaked in the shower and I was wearing a Ghostbusters uniform. I'm shocked she hasn't left me yet.
Her brother was practicing the clarinet....it was like having sex in a starbucks
CANT TOUCH THIS JUST CAME ON MY IPOD. LOVE STEVE JOBS
I made a drinking game out of watching your DUI video, everytime you say " okay, well thats just your opinion"
Going to the market. I need some nachos and a serious re-evalution of my life.
I think the camel was justified in biting me.
I wonder what acid is like for a blind person... Can we find this out?
I had to put a towel over my laptop because the little power light was too bright. New hangover low.
I'm throwing in the towel on today. The puke gods have won this war
I have a big to do list for you. Number 1 - me. Number 2 - drink wine 3. Talk my ears off. 4. Me again
I have to pee in a cup in the morning and they are going to say....you just peed a miller light. I'm going to hang my head in shame and say yes...yes I did.
They came over the loud speaker and said "no laying on the dance floor.." I thought i was dancing, but apparently that's just the way it started out.
Nothing like the judgmental looks you get in the bathroom when you still have last night's glowsticks on
Then James put his arms through the window and grabbed him, like he was Robocop. A nerdy, portly Robocop.
Who is this?
Randomize
