i just got a UPS package from a name and address i dont know, with one of my thongs in it. no recollection.
i just saw a white kid with an afro using a martini shaker as a coffee thermos. go college.
there are so many fish in the see you have left to fuck
Ya. I was the definition of a shit show. I woke up outside my door when my alarm went off
Her life is proof that being a drunken slut will get you places.
A stranger just came up to me and asked why I hadn't texted him, and if he was just a one night stand. I live for these moments.
Before I left he insisted on serenading me with a ukalele. I might be a little bit in love
Did not foresee holding down food at work today to be a struggle today
I saw Nicolas Cage's face in the moon. Those were good shrooms.
So again no comment on the cleavage. I'm a bit disappointed. If those girls come together to make cleavage AND I send you a pic of it, you have to comment on it. That's like relationship 101.
My night ended with a French cab driver offering me his sperm free of cost.
There's something really beautiful about walk of shaming past the Capitol.
...I watched him run on the beach yesterday and I think I started ovulating
But he's super into Jesus and I'm the devil. So we weren't meant to be
And our sex soundtracks thus far have been metal and Star Wars
Randomize
