Tip #47, don't trim the bush when you have the shakes!
So she said grabbing my cock was like holding a giant crayola from pre-school.
that was the beginning of the end.
I wanna dance tonight. i just wanna grind my ass in some man's dick.
Drawing dicks in the frost on people's windshields is a rare joy I allow myself while walking to my 8 AM class.
She had to leave early so she could get ready for her high school's homecoming. I hope her date likes sloppy seconds.
I cant believe you went home with her.. Your poor immune system and the shit you put it through.
Steve is gonna hang his bear rug on the wall because he doesn't trust us not to have sex on it...
bad night - i tried for naughty librarian but could only manage to pull off pissed off barrista.
Okay now that I've been wanting to eat these hot cheetos in the bathroom, I know it's time I need to stop smoking and go to sleep.
he sent me a pic of his dick and balls out with sunglasses over them like a face. i was at dinner.
do you still have it? i kinda want to see.
You were my sober police. You had one job and you failed miserably.
I'm a corrupt cop.
Saw 2 lesbians fist fighting outside the bar tonight. I was startled yet slightly turned on
We have a lot of substance abuse to do tomorrow its sleep time
I'm sorry I called your mother a reasonably-priced receptacle.
Three times. Three times I left home yesterday in search for sex, and three times I returned un-orgasmed.
Randomize
