Wooohooo! I'm sitting in the car like a creep watching people walk in and out of Blush. Lots of happy people.
Maybe I'll tuck it in and pretend to be a woman pretending to be a man that is attracted to women that are attracted to women who look like men
The boys are giving me the exam answers and I don't even have to expose my body..yayy engineering!
dear sober me, don't br the first to open the fridge in the morning
He was just laying on the stairs and then screamed, "Is that a clubhouse?" I haven't seen him since
He called himself excalibur. Thats all I remember.
She said we should all be mermaids since didn't breathe for 9 months inside our mothers. I want her logic.
Uggh answer your phone, you are the only one I know who'll be proud of what I woke up next to this morning .
So I vaguely remember making out with you this morning, I think you were on a date?
Her vagina felt like a fur coat. It was weird at first but I kinda liked it
We're all getting matching jack daniels tattoos. We're gonna be an alcoholic gang of awesome.
Then that means he's outwardly conservative. Inwardly he's a total gay horndog. He's like a spy that can ruin conservative plans.
I want to change all my life goals to that.
5 hours of volunteer work playing with puppies and banned from the frat I hate most as 'punishment'... Besides the ER trip, I'm not seeing the bad in this situation
Note to self: don't try to shave your legs when sex-sore. You CANT reach, stop trying.
It's official, I'm not staying in tonight
What caused that decision?
You only live once
Randomize
