I'm upset that MJ died and all but waking up to his face on my HDTV in the middle of the night while half-asleep is pretty much the scariest fucking thing ever.
no, its his 'welcome back from rehab' party.
I spit up blood this morning
That's vegas.
I just threw up trying to put pants on. This is obviously a sign to stay naked.
I WALKED myself out of breath. And I'm lost I'm a Tim Hortons parking lot. That's how hungover I am.
We got back from Mcdonalds and literally 5 minutes of being in your room, you wanted to go back because "We haven't been yet."
YOU CAN'T JUST DO COKE AND THEN CALM DOWN
Everyone was hooking up and I was just by myself rolling around in the grass at one point ... Which I am allergic to.
I needed that adderall to break my tradition of passing out at the bar on Sundays
I found him in his pink and white boxer out side the dorm hall and the only thing he said was "it wouldn't let me in"
He made me twerk for scrambled eggs... I regret nothing
Would I be crazy if I drove 1,000 miles for some dick? What mile does it become ridiculous?
He told me I remind him of his ex girlfriend but in a better more advanced way..
I swear if you help me with this I will eat you out and buy you all the Taco Bell you want.
Will u lay on an air mattress with me and drink vodka while we listen to Rick James?
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