I just saw grafitti that read "Mug The Fart Eater". Really, Memphis? That's all you've got?
I guess she didn't feel like it. There was hair all over it and everything
you proceeded to suck on ur pinkie saying it reminded you of chris and you wanted him badly
worst night to have a conscience
I think i just got paid for sex with a hot pocket... and i accepted
When asked if they had been introduced, Damo said "No but I know we've pretty much fucked all the same girls in town"
Just got discharged from the hospital after getting my finger stitched back together don't you dare say you had a worse night than me
You have amazing self restraint. If there was one thing I could learn from you, that wouldn't be it. I love my life as it is.
i think ive crossed the line from sexually frustrated to sexually furious
My one night stand said I love you, opened my fridge, stole my cream cheese and left.
Last night someone asked you what your favorite color was and you said "bagel."
His name is Angel. I'm pretty sure he was sent from heaven solely to eat me out.
There was a comma in between her and dick. I was calling you a dick. Jesus.
I was sending him tit pics while watching how to train your dragon 2. It was everything.
How many weight watcher activity points do you think sex is worth?
Randomize
