This sounds like "Sober" Ericka. Sorry that message wasn't for you. I only do business with "Fell off the wagon" Ericka. Please pass that message along to her.
We've shared an experience, my friend. I, too, have talked on the phone with a parent while giving a handjob
The vomit I understand but how is there seaweed in my bed?
if i find out your the one who pierced my belly button im going to fuck your sister again
Im in the bathtub drunk. Less than an hour before the interview. This will be the best or worst career move ever., support?
Apparently, I kept going on about how i'm going to name my first born Ramen. I think this is a good parenting move.
Well the "Blackout with your sack out" party turned out predictably.
I will no longer accept being cock blocked in my own bed.
I ended up passing out on the shitter for like an hour with mcds smoothie all over my face
Yeah, you went up to him and said "I stare at people until they feel obligated to talk to me."
I'm high and I have a consensual booty call on the way and just thought that it was a good time to let you know that I think that you are a stellar person.
I have straight up perfected the art of amazing manicures with shaky-as-fuck adderall hands. Also, I'm way too proud of this.
We were drunk having sex and I knocked over her bedside table/fish bowl and she jumped off to check if her fish was still alive but she made me pasta so it's cool
I brought those bastards cookies so they can deal with my sex noise, fuck them and their roommate asses
Just puked. First it was bright neon blue then it turned to bright lime green. How does that even happen? And wtf was I drinkin last night?
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