D3 body, D1 cock
Really stoned
just sent my roommate on a cheese run
so after all day drinking, we went to an all u can eat crab place and i was going from table to table surveying the crowd if they though the crab i was carrying around looked like the flying dog from never ending story...what the hell is wrong with me?
She knew it was going down when I had her search for "condoms" in my iPhone Maps.
Buying $100 worth of beef jerkey sounded like a terrific idea last night.
I got my period while he was fingering me , I knew it because I never get that wet.
Did u at least say sorry?
You just kept saying "they don't make cigarettes for squirrels. Yet."
Sometimes I wish I could open my skin and just take a little peek at my liver. You know, just to see if it's rotten yet or still perfect looking.
He showed up at my door at 3 AM wearing a Santa hat with a tiara attached.
"DO YOU LIKE FLYING KITES" WORKED AS A PICKUP LINE. SUCK IT.
So the guy I hooked up with during welcome week just tried to booty call me from across the lecture hall at 9am. I don't think he gets how this works...
My feelings for him are donzo molonzo but I can't turn down a pierced penis...
Only time and a comprehensive case study of all of your relationships will tell.
Go makeout with Mickey Mouse so we can get FastPass tickets
THERE IS A MAN IN THE BATHROOM IN COLONIAL GARB GET HERE
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