i feel like i'm a professional at blowjobs i can deep throat an entire spatula
I'm drunk in class and I'm pretty sure the bible freak behind me is saying a prayer for me
I remember her trying to talk to me a few times after we broke up and I'd always change the subject to bagels.
shes perfect for him. shes never seen a penis so she has nothing to compare his to.
I refuse to fuck a guy who needs a coozy for his beer. NOT EVEN IN DESPERATE TIMES LIKE THESE.
Lest we forget our veterans. Also that two years ago I lost my virginity on this day in a hot tub. Go me for being the worst person on earth.
Drinking Patron always ends with me puking or receiving anal. So make your move when I start ordering it.
She said if her future children dont have blue eyes she wont love them
I found pix on her phone of me passed out and her sticking things up my ass. Its over.
I just came so hard my hamstring felt like it was going to tear. I am also now a screamer
I just did a walk of shame on my own block. one of the old neighbors saw and greeted me "good morning, girl next door"
Oh I fucked him, definitely. We played Strip Halo.
Been there. Done that. Still have his t-shirt.
I would give away three of my own ribs to be able to eat myself out.
...ew
I’m planning a Pharmasutra for the first night after the pandemic ends
Pharmasutra?
Me + Chris + cocktails + viagra = night of orgasms
Randomize
