i think my mom watched the whole time
This guy has a retainer. We're golden.
Just found a keg and a mini-bike in our garage, this couldn't possibly go wrong
Do you have any idea how hard it is to cum to Chingy?!
i will be blacked out in the shower. come get me. 20 mins.
Just saw a crackhead get taken down by pd in the canal. Its offically spring
i pretended i was deaf and got a girl to come home with me
Just heard the girl at the bar cuss her bf out and order a long island ice tea. Going to give it 5 min then I'm going in. See you on the other side.
I got kicked out of the bar for suggesting that the bartender drop her tits into my Redbull instead of the usual liquor
Good morning! Just thought I'd give you my yearly reminder that we lost our virginities 7 years ago, yesterday.
That's the best creepy text ever.
He told me the hickey on the side if his neck was actually a "bruise" from hitting a bird on his motorcycle. I'm not sure what's more impressive, the fact people believed him due to the size of the mark or the fact you gave it to him.
i was asked to be gay of honor by three different girls and NONE of the groomsmen at any of the weddings is open to experimenting. i mean whats the point then.
Have you ever thrown up in the middle of your hair appointment? Cause I have..
I had sex upstairs in my parents house, and my mom texted me and said "those raccoons are out of control in the walls."
I have a video on my phone of someone streaking in my house last night, do you have any idea who it is?
Randomize
