That chick was all over your bacon last night, grinding on you, I thought you were going to bang her in the club
Dude it was a lap dance
I accidentally burped into my bong.
Honestly there's alot of things I'm confused about the only thing I know for certain about last night is that I ate pizza
I called him Han Solo during sex, he looked at me like he was mortified then I realized he came.
lets have sex before this no shave november shit gets outta hand.
i think beer pong is the only time ive ever found a use for geometry
I need Christmas break to be over. I'm tired of fucking my old High School girlfriends
The girl in the white might have stds. I'm strangely okay with this.
Today as a vday present for myself I am walking in between any couples I see on campus.
Uhh, there's a legit bruise on my boob.. Again how does he manage this
after that, he'll be sure to remember me. i'll probably forget him, but that's the way it should be.
I don't know how I feel about the stuff we got from that guy. Me and Monty are driving through town listening to static at full blast...
I woke up in a poorly constructed blanket fort on a strange office floor covered in rug burns and champagne. How was your night?
I basically have sex lined up for me in three different countries. If that's not a feat I don't know what is
a reward? ill think of something
if its not drugs or food I swear to god ill throw a fit
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