ill give you a foot job if you come over before 4
well that was a long night...
dude, you were pretty messed up... what happened?
no idea... but i still woke up with my pirate hat on
i stapled my math hw together with an ear ring, too ghetto?
I found a picture of my kindergarten class. Now you can see whose peer pressure I succumbed to.
every facebook tagged picture of yours, you are either drinking, swimming or drunk in water
God forbid we drive unregistered mopeds without license plates on a pedestrians only sidewalk without goggles while flipping off passing cars.
Somewhere in the night I send my Dad a text stating "YOU failed as a parent"
The floor and the wall just switched. I'm falling.
Remember that time i gave you head on MY birthday and you made me stop so you could watch the rhino part in 300
Lets both be adults and never talk about last night again.
You were discovered in a bush, smoking, and singing "in the jungle" to yourself. Which explains the scratches, but not the orange paint.
I thought you were dead but then you asked me if your tits looked good. They did.
I'm pretty sure I naked in my first year of college more than I was as a baby.
Just stay awake and booze cruise it to class. How are you a senior and have never went to class drunk? No excuses, I have a better gpa.
Give me one good reason why I should go with you.
Free beer.
..pick me up at 8.
Randomize
