idk why but i just wanna to have sex with the idea of him. i don't even wanna meet him.
well most of my day revolves around power hour
talked to my RA about stamps and mailmen again. when do you think she'll realize that i only talk to her when i'm high?
drunk...on the white house tour...security is staring. this will not end well.
My gynecologist just commented on how well my vagina was waxed
I'm gonna wear that dress that makes me look like a slut. You know, the one your sister got arrested in.
I just remember making out with this kid's friend, washing blood off my hands and hearing the RA's were looking for me.
her spring break bucket list included "break into The Swamp, blow him where Tebow has Tebowed"
I walked by the two of them and mouthed "fuck me" based on there reaction I think they just came in their pants
He gave me twenty cool ranch tacos and declared, drunk, " Look, I do good"
An d I'd rather cry while putting a waffle in my mouth than cry on my pillow, ya feel me?
IS NO AN EMOTION BECAUSE THAT'S WHAT I'M FEELING RIGHT NOW
I can't believe my vagina just got wished happy new year
The single life is the freaking dream dude. I'm sitting here naked, eating chocolate mousse, and watching Gilmore girls. It's wonderful
I blacked out. Broke into their house. Took a shit, and left. This is why you can't leave me unattended.
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