I think I kinda wanna bone that ginger from Harry Potter.
You literally just made my flesh crawl.
well i just puked at a family gathering so i can cross that off the bucket list
trsut me youll find me, im the only kanye west here and every1 is chanting dbag at me
he is so annoying
so stop sleeping with him
yeah but he is so hot when i'm drunk
Skanksgiving break is awesome already... pilgrim and indian roleplay tonight.
Dude, Taco Bell gave me a free fiesta potatoes when I won a bet on wether I could fit the entire rim of a cup in my mouth.
don't forget friday is see who can get the most free drinks at the gay bar contest. winner gets $50
everyone at work keeps looking at me like they know I got the herp this weekend
We were on the balcony tossing jello shots to people passing below
When people said no i'd yell "i tried them i promise they aren't roofied!"
I DONT WANT YOUR DICK. I WANT BRUNCH.
I'm like a saiyan, every time I get trashed I come back stronger
We got cut off at a bar at 4pm. We aren't human
Dear Douchebag, I would just like to formally issue this fuck you. You will be receiving a letter in the mail soon. With all of your stuff.
You said you're gonna end your night with a six pack and awful erotica
I don't think getting eaten out in a smart car behind a circle-k on my break by a guy I just met classifies as social distancing, but I'm beginning to love night shift more and more.
Randomize
