who do you think you are?
someone who doesn't ask that question
I think I just was a dick to Paul Rudd.
He bought me ice cream and then I gave him a bj
I think that's fair trade off
His roomates just started party boying me. He stood there with the look of horror on his face.
she's sitting in the bathroom of SA telling people to come in for a toilet ride
I think that was him coming out to me. I just brushed it off
And I think your bro would be happy to know that when I took my bra off like 10lbs of confetti fell out. It was like my tits were celebrating being free
We just broke into a lion king sing along. Understanding is not possible.
I wish I got like a congrats basket for being a responsible sexually active member of society complete with condoms, tissues and lollipops.
Did he think I was flirting with him when I ordered a hot dog bc no
mom how many of the songs from my childhood are mexican drinking songs?
all of them.
do you remember your solution to not spill your drinks last night? .. Shots, that way you wouldnt have time to spill them. i love your drunken logic haha
We should probably feel disgusted that we took turns eating and drunkenly passing around a burrito the size of a small dog but i’m ok with it.
He was so traumatized by the It's a small world ride but he immediately pulled out a flask from god-knows-where and got drunk before the ride was over. The ride operator didn't blame him.
He just blew a .079. Jesus loves him THAT much.
Randomize
