Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
im at a bar with my dad last night and he got hit on more that I did
adderall just fell out of my nose in class. guy next to me just nodded.
He's either a really good actor or an actual prince, I'm fine with both so I'll sleep with him.
I got groped on the dancefloor by both grooms. I love gay weddings
How in the hell did I take a shot of whiskey to the eyeball last night?
No, we talked about it. They're cool with me living here as long as I sleep with them both.
You're a rent hooker.
Let's not refer to him as Dustin. That makes him seek like a real person, not just a dick I would like to experience.
I'm glad I get the same reaction from you for cookies and for my naked body
I'll give you $10 to get a dick pic with a gecko on it.
That's just weird. That doesn't make sense sexually at all. I mean, you might as well tape a pen to the tip and try and write your name while you're at it.
Sext: Bring me pancakes from the midnight breakfast gathering please
Paige is home safe.
Actually, she's here now, punching me in the face. You should've kept her keys.
THE FASTEST WAY TO MY HEART IS THROUGH FAMILY SIZED BAGS OF GENERIC BRAND CHEESE BALLS
You're the best thing in my life, followed closely by cannabis and trashy romance novels
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