I wish I could get plan B off e-bay so it would be a secret and cheap.
i am devastated. she was DTF and I was about to puke, i told her to wait outside my room for a second. Puked. Passed out woke up, she was gone. Found puke stains on my keyboard that seem to spell out youporn....
I woke up at 2 pm to my roommate checking my pulse.
Just because you're using the Hipstamatic app for your nude photo taking, it doesn't make your drunken blowjob pics any classier.
The forest. Magic mushrooms. Wind trees leaves sky. That is alll.
Maybe walking up to the cops busting our party with a "Things go better with Coke" t-shirt on and asking for my extra license back that my little brother got busted with wasn't the best idea of the night.
Carry on my wayward bro, there'll be beer when you get low. lay your neon tank to rest, dont you rage no more.
He handled me like a finger puppet on crack... Time to ice the vagina, I'd like to sit down sometime today.
Its been 4 years since I have masturbated this hard. God bless the Olympics!
It's awesome, he has so much more free time now that he's not screwing other girls behind my back
she came back from her house with A paper cut , a 2liter of sprite with Bacardi , and half a mustache . we're inviting her more ofte
I'm thinking about slathering myself with peanut butter and going to the dog park. What's the worst that could happen?
I have to be more responsible. I've dropped three lighters into my bong today.
I'm so excited you texted me but I'm way to high to process it
They were so sore! Either I have bed bugs or you were biting my nipples last night and don't lie to me.
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