I just watched Juno. I kind of wish I was in highschool and pregnant
Iced coffee. Banana. Two dumps. Life is good.
Terrible. Enormous nipples with a small ring of boob on the outside. It looked like a tittie eclipse
I have no idea how to attract men with my personality anymore. He can't see my tits via facebook chat
her moans were so awkward that i kept asking "what" when she'd say my name...
When my alarm went off, he rolled over and asked me: Bacon or dick? Yes, I will see him again.
Soo time for a life change, my 6 yr old sister made my gf a puke bucket for her birthday
I took Xanax and it did nothing to me. First sign I'm crazy and actually need it.
You know what's fun. When your getting a new mattress and you forget you put your vibrator under your old mattress and the moving guy finds it
We have such limited time together he literally sends me text messages that are like "I sent my roommates on an impossible quest, we have 15 minutes." it's that bad.
Nevermind, there are three drinks waiting at the bar for me. I cannot disappoint this alcohol.
while i am personally glad that we met...i feel like for society as a whole it was a bad thing
Awkward, walking to my bootycall's hotel room and run into my dad leaving his. Just nodded to each other and went on our ways
i have a strong feeling that today will be a naked day for me...i don't feel like doing shit
Only thing I have going for me is jacking off, weed, and saturdays
Randomize
