I woke up this morning next to some guy. I was horrified, he woke up and said, "the white tiger strikes again!"
oh God, I have a dick of a middle schooler
he climbed up to our party on the 2nd floor balcony and then pulled a glass mug and a beer from his knapsack. these freshmen are intense
all i care about is the story behind my toaster ending up in the microwave
I tackled a mailbox like a linebacker. He almost broke his hip and his friend lit a bottle rocket off inside of the car. Yes it was a successful night.
You don't understand. This could be the last time I shave a star into my vag. Get over here.
i am rolling on molly so fucking hard i want to do 300 cartwheels
Tune in tm morning for how to buy Plan B in a foreign country while coming down off ecstasy
My desperation for dick was off put by his anime figure collection.
We had sex on his sofa while his friend cheered and threw bugles at us
He can't say no, it's my spiritual goddamn quest.
ugh, my whole family is going ape shit over my sister's pregnancy blog. I dont get it? Anyone can get knocked up! I had rebound sex with a new york ranger last night, now that is something to fucking blog about.
I swear to god, no guy has been as interested in sticking stuff up my butt as this girl
we bonded over knowing every word to freaky gurl by gucci mane so it’s kinda starting to make sense why I gave him head in his cul de sac
Didn't know my clit could produce that many orgasms in one night. Fuck my husband; think I might have to become a lesbian.
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