My ? Is...... Would it be sweet or creepy to take a girl on a first date to chigago?
creepy.
im having a hard time not telling ppl about ur bathroom story
A moment of silence for all our pussy whips bro's who had to endure the NEW MOON premier!
everytime she opens her mouth i wish that i was deaf
Sending me a thank you card for letting you fuck my sister was completely inappropriate
I am fine. Katie thinkr i broke things pole dancing. I am coherant.
How do I tell my Dad that in the picture he has of me and my brother as the background of his phone we were both rolling face on ecstasy?
After seeing how much you are able to funnel in a night, I am 90% sure your blood is pure gin.
She came to class yesterday wearing a shirt saying Maybe Partying Will Help. Showed up to class today and puked three times.
sorry to break it to you, but he's definitely fucking that other girl now...
I wish I still at least had the bruises on my ass to remember him by.
Oh my god. I slept with my boyfriend last night. It was wonderful.
And when I say my boyfriend I mean my electric blanket. Because that's the kind of life I lead.
Celebrated the veterans I suppose, my mouth tastes of gin and black outs
I was amazing, unlike anything he's ever experienced. I somehow made him feel young and old.and he never felt old before. He feels I will literally kill him. With my magic, lethal vagina.
He tried to brush a hair off my cheek, but turns out it was just a freakishly long chin hair. So no, we didn't bang.
This is a life or shit situation. Grab me toilet paper asap. This bathroom is fucking out. This is not a test. This an actual emergency and I am not joking.
Randomize
