In the car with my brother. His CD went from 2pac to Taylor Swift. I'm concerned. It wasn't a mistake, he knows all the words.
You tried to convince her that if she gave you head she'd hear the ocean.....
the blizzard started in kansas. im debating driving to a bar now so i can get snowed in there for the game
Woke up on the floor with my glow stick in one hand & dollar bills in the other. Good. Morning.
This is one of the fundamental differences between you and I. If I found meat in a plastic bag, I wouldn't put it in my mouth.
cat food counts as protein by the way
Lauren she was gnawing on a dresser. Gnawing. On. A. Dresser.
Lil wasted at a baby shower. Here's to beating teen pregnancy BOTTOMS UP
Had sex with him again...yikes. and the whole time he kept saying "i wish we could do this forever." Forever lasted about 45 seconds
Just because he told you it was safe doesn't mean you should have licked it.
You tried to wave to Meg on Family Guy and got upset because she wasn't waving back
I was so high I watched a 5 minute video of different scenes of horses running. The music was magical.
SOMETIMES YOU HAVE TO BLAST VANESSA CARLTON IN YOUR CAR AT MIDNIGHT TO FEEL AGAIN. IDK.
He told me that losing me was the biggest mistake of his life. Of course it was. My tits are incredible and I know more about college football than he does.
He was someone so memorable that I'd completely forgotten he'd existed up to and during the encounter
Randomize
