i think i have two assholes
so he came on my face and then proceeded to say "that was just how i imagined it would happen"
where do you find these guys?
that's almost as bad as that time i almost ashed in a baby carriage
you have a cum towel under your bed, you're the definition of single
I gave you a 45 minute blowjob. You were inside me for 3 minutes. I'm going to need you to get your shit together.
ill be fine wheb you get back. I'm gunna do real world things like washing the dishes. having to perform serious tasks brings you down.
The realization of how permanent those tattoos really were set in this morning... I am SO sorry.
Bro, I just googled 36 year old pussy so when I do see it I won't be shocked.
seriously they are like going to hulk burst through. There are perks and downfalls to having big boobs
He said his fantasy involved both of us fucking while stuffed into the same overalls
Doing coke by yourself isn't as fun. Even when you're watching a James Franco movie.
Well the streak is over, I saw a penis today
Well I mean I HAD done a pretty good job of not pooping myself through the years
I realized it was late, and he was my brother in humanity and another incarnation of my own life force and consciousness, so I regained control of myself, thanked him for helping me, and went home.
We're hate flirting, damnit.
Randomize
