okay pat passed out under dana's car
you were mad bc i took longer then 2 minutes to finish
on the way home the dog started throwing up her bone in the car..so naturally i started to puke too
You left half a beer on someones car and claimed it was a second day of hanakuh gift
I'm still finding big obvious chunks of condom around my car.
But you've got to admit , for how blackout I was I look fucking unreal in those pictures
I feel like he's mythological. Like you just had lunch with the Loch Ness Monster of hotness
Momentum is force x velocity. So therefore velocity is 0 - hammered, and force is ur legs locked up and ur face hits the ground.
I felt paralized they just wouldnt move. We need segways when were drunk cuz if we start to fall forward they well take off and save the fall.
I don't want anything calamari shaped after last night. But I appreciate the Cheerios offer.
She said "I feel like I haven't reached my full potential" and I couldn't figure if she meant in life or with the weed..
That makes sense.. A good Bj is a trump card in any argument
I'm not asking for life coaching, I'm just asking if you know where I left my underpants.
I'm kind of pissed I'm not hungover, that means I could have totally drank more last night.
He told you he loved you. Then you wanted to find a chainsaw to cut his dick off.
well true... there's not a real discreet way to masturbate in public
Randomize
