you had a panic attack, pissed yourself, and started crying. you never go above the kiddie level of my lil bros schools haunted house ever again.
round 2?
EVER.
i was drunk and our names rhymed...what was i supposed to do?
Today should be called shooting fish in a barrel day. Every place ive gone to ive met a girl who regrets not hooking up last night. There have not been girls this easy since Fathers Day
not sure what to think.... picked her up and her dad says "if you take her home, you'll regret it"
I don't care. I'm going to fuck John's friend and it's all your fault.
Dude, they are shaking the RV, yell at them. It feels like i'm being rocked to sleep, I don't like it, I'm not a baby.
It took years to rebuild my brains forcefield against your charm and I feel like u seal team 6'd ur way in again and caught my common sense sleeping on post
Guess who used an inflatable mattress to boat across a retention pond with brooms for oars and a radio and beer.
I couldn't drink enough to fuck the friend, you said challenge accepted and stole some chicks shot.
Well, maybe we can talk about it over a drink and some crushed up vicodin.
It's a whole movie about Joseph Gordon-Levitt watching porn and having sex... I NEED to own it..
You have better ratings than Crest. Only 4/5 dentists recommend it. You have 8/9 recommendation for your blowjob skills.
I need you to be best friend brutally honest about whether or not I can go into public like this.
I'm sorry I walked in on you guys, but all I heard from outside was her screaming "Dive, dive!". Sex was my last guess for what was going on in there.
Walked off the dance floor to find Gabe hitting on a dad bod at the bar. It was my Dad. Awkward is an understatement.
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