Remember that dream I told you about where I shit out my own skeleton? I had it again last night.
I just want to know how you cleaned her puke off the twister mat with no gloves. And didn't throw up
hey girl hope you're alright, you hit that tree really hard. have a good night.
will you please explain to me as to why or how i have a dirtbike tread looking bruise on my back?
Bob the builder, bob the uilder bob the builder bbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbjbbbbbiotch!pp!!!!
You were yelling at the bowl of salad and telling it to quit taunting you and telling you to go to tacobell
I figured out why I insisted on leaving my sweater on the ground outside. I smelled it and I'm 97% sure I peed on it last night
Ed's in which sucks about a thousand cocks... But thats 1800 less than working with Alex so it's gonna be a good day
Very excited! Vodka will be shot, dicks will be ridden, and memories made.
You don't put off sexcapades. Life lesson #1.
Bang-toberfest begins!!
why can't I meet attractive men at the places I like to hang out? like books a million. or the liquor store.
Isn't it my whole life blown into this perfect spoon shaped piece of melted and artificially colored sand?
Wow.
I've never been to an orgy, but I would assume nachos wouldn't be out of the question at one.
His phone started ringing when we were pulled over and he said 'hold on, this is most likely more important than you', proceeded to answer it and agree to work sunday, then hung up, looked at the cop and told him to continue.
Randomize
