You'd love this place it's beautiful. Plus these people smell like garlic
evidently tequilla and lady gaga make me flirt and grind shamlessly with other men infront of my boyfriend.
I was just standing there and then BOOM! She was attacking my face with her mouth.
I don't get it, man. She treated me like a sexual predator but treated you like a piece of meat.
do u think i could put an abortion on my debit card?
There is a bruise on my cock the size of a golfball. Bad sign.
still drunk. talking shit to the doc drawing my blood. this has no upside
my mom just cut me up lemons and limes so i would have some vitamins with my tequlia
Standards? I'm sitting on his couch eating microwaved ramen wearing his wife's t-shirt. I don't remember what having standards even feels like.
Man in California was arrested for killing and eating a wild bobcat while high on crystal meth. Let's please NEVER get that high on anything...
Just saw a midget on a motorcycle. Best sight for a hangover ever.
You were holding up a boot and yelling boot gang
I can't be here...my therapist just watched me take tequila shots
You sat on me. Like I was a toilet. While I was on the toilet. You peed a little.
I am NOT pregnant
My barren womb can FUCK WHOEVER I want
Should I rub the neighbors amazon package in the dog shit they left on the front steps?
Randomize
