just watched an entire episode so you think you can dance for head. so wasn't worth it
He was crying to my sister about feeling like a bad person. Then he groped my breasts.
That's cool, I just have to let the dogs out AND SO HELP ME GOD IF YOU TEXT ME BAHA MEN LYRICS WE ARE NOT FRIENDS.
I feel like everything I touch in this bar I'm gonna get hepatitis. my kinda joint
Just found my old bop it. So many drinking game possibilities
He just turned 21, it's very obvious the end of their relationship is near. Now we play the waiting game.
$100 bras are my way of telling my boobs that I love and appreciate them, and all the metaphorical doors they have opened for me.
they had to hand cuff you because you wouldn't stop trying to unzip the paramedic's pants...this is why i love you
It's surprise blowjob week. You should be excited.
I forgot how weird my hair bleaches and now I'm a calico
You can wake up to my rainbow of failure
I did however clean up the cupcakes and vomit so I'm not that bad of a roommate
Ugh it's 2016, why can't our bodies just shed fat on their own
I woke up uncovered, spread eagled to my dad saying "you really need to stop sleeping naked."
Today has been hell. Also I saw a dead man's penis. It's safe to say I will be getting very drunk tonight.
Decided to stay sober a couple days, learned how exceptionally stupid my coworkers are. Might have to quit now. Moral of the story:be careful where you go sober.
Randomize
